22 years old with a massive love for the world. New Jersey native, world traveler, volunteer, Yoga instructor, gardener, clean-eating vegetarian, lover of sunshine, recovered anorexic, and damn proud of it. on New Years Day our house burnt down.
read about my trips, nutrition, yoga, nature, and soul searchin'.
It’s funny because
I opened my iTunes to the playlist of a CD I made you and tomorrow I start taking on Yoga Therapy clients
and I wouldn’t have been asking the Universe for things
if I had stuck around with you,
because you suck.
BOOM, straight to the heart chakra.
You Can Heal Your Life, Louise Hay.
Tonight I saw a candle burning in the bathroom of a friend of a friend and I wonder if he, too, worries that maybe if he is outside too long, or if he falls asleep too early, the bathroom curtain will catch fire and eventually ignite the whole house?
It was apple cinnamon but maybe soon it would be plastic and then paint and wood and shingles and carpet.
And I wonder sometimes, am I being paranoid that my house will burn down if I light my incense and walk away, or if the oven overheats while I am in the garden and what if I was responsible for that and how would we manage?
And in the kitchen, too, he has a candle, and I wonder if I should do him the favor of blowing it out.
True Life: Sometimes I miss smoking 3 blunts a day doing nothing but melting into your couch.
But nah mostly not.
Remember that time we stayed up all night and had sex at 5am and got bagels at 6am?
I miss you and I hope you’re doing well.
Yes please! I’ll be there in January :)
Every time I post about BGSU, I get a message from someone there welcoming me to Ohio :) You are awesome. Thank you!! See you in a few months :P
I made a friend from Denver that laughed at me for loving rocks so much. So she brought me to the biggest, most beautiful Red Rocks in Colorado!
Over 4th of July weekend I went out and spent the first three nights in Aspen at the St. Moritz Lodge. $63/night, shared room/bathroom. My last night was spent in Boulder with a really lovely friend I met in Guatemala.
I won a weekend pass to Wanderlust from the Little Hippies Foundation. Four days of music, yoga, health, and the outdoors.
Colorado was absolutely fascinating. Everyone was outside, walking, riding, hiking, climbing, rafting, running, dancing! There was land and space that they did NOTHING with! Not owned by anyone in particular, not even being used as a farm. Just open space. Grass that could grow as tall as it wanted until the snow came. What a bizarre concept. How foreign. What a peaceful place.
The people, the lifestyle, the attitude. It’s all so different from all the other places I have been. I for sure recommend it. Especially if you like rocks like I do.
June 19th & 20th, 2014.
This is Ohio. This is what the majority of Ohio seems to look like.
My guts keep bringing me back to Bowling Green.
A 9 hour drive to visit the school, to check out the town, to see if my intuition was at all on-point.
Ohio is more beautiful than everyone has made it sound. I actually kind of liked it. There is so much wide open space and green and quiet. I’ll be moving there in January, a Junior at Bowling Green State University. Majoring in International Studies and minoring in Public Health. I’ll be studying abroad for half of it.
I have fallen asleep in the same bedroom for 22 years. Moving is scary but exciting. New people, new food, new places, new experiences, new opportunities.
See you 5 months from today, Ohio.
You are my best kept secret.
Or maybe the worst kept secret.
You are the moment in time I don’t talk about. The one thing I don’t share. That time that no one brings up because no one knows.
A place I didn’t want to be at with people I didn’t know, in an area I still don’t know. Sometimes I wonder if you even know my name. Then I wonder why I care or why you’re even in my head. Embarrassed, weak, ashamed, hurt, regretful, dirty, stupid, young. I know yours, and I even know the color of your eyes behind the glasses that you don’t wear anymore. It’s ironic because there were so many people there that I still see and share space with but I haven’t seen you since and no one knows. I’ve heard your name only a handful of times in the last 6 years and each time I cringe but it’s okay now. Moreso, I wish you are happy. I hope you are living a life you are proud of. I hope you have a better head on your shoulders than you did when you were 18. I know I am no longer that girl, and I’ve forgiven us both.
This wont leave my head. I guess it matters to my subconscious more than I admit. Hopefully it’s out now. Be gone, bad memories, I don’t have time for you anymore ~~~